Take a minute and truly think about ALL the things that you do – from the moment you open up your eyes in the morning till you crash back down again. How many times did you want to call someone, other than your mom, to tell them about your crazy, hilarious adventures in motherhood without judgment or criticism?
Mom friends are important. They are going to be the ones to let you know when those crazy patterned leggings you got last month are just wack. They are the ones that are going to bail you out when you are about to go postal on your toddler for squeezing toothpaste all over the bathroom. They are the ones willing to meet up at the park for a playdate at the crack of dawn because we all know that between the hours of 10am till 2pm that kid is a huge crank-o-saurus.
So how does one acquire (or better yet, become) a super mommy friend?
Put Yourself Out There
Get out the door! Babies sleep – A LOT!!! That doesn’t mean you have to commit yourself to the house. Get your little one(s) in the stroller and out the door! Nothing is a better icebreaker than a baby. Plus, you’ll get a whole load of compliments on your bundle of joy.
Join a MOMS GROUP!
Looking for one location with abundant option of moms friends? Join a Moms Group! It’s a great way to entertain the kiddos, find some mom friends, and most importantly – give you a little break.
Make the First Move
If you think your tired, feel awkward, and barely got it together. Remember, all the other moms pretty much feel the same way. Remember that we’re all in the same parenting boat and that other moms, no matter how together they may appear to be, are just as desirous of mom friendship as you are.
Get Contact Information
Once you’ve broken the ice and shared a few laughs, be sure to end any impromptu playground or supermarket meet by exchanging contact information with your potential mom friend. In the beginning, keep things simple. Find out how your new friend likes to be reached — phone calls, texts, emails — and stick to that.
Plan the First Playdate
Even if you hit it off with a new mom friend, a first playdate can still be anxiety-provoking. The two of you are still searching for common ground while trying to keep an eye on the kids. In the best-case scenario, the kids will play well on their own and you’ll have enough time to get to know one another. The worst-case scenario: Your kids demand too much attention and there is pulling, pushing, and wailing that disrupts the personal interaction.
Try to pick a time and place that works best for you and your child. If your little one is happiest and most energetic in the morning, suggest meeting then. If she’s typically overstimulated in new environments, host a playdate at your home. Plan ahead of time and be strategic. Keep in mind that it’s not just about how your child feels: If feeding time makes you nervous, avoid a lunchtime playdate. If something doesn’t work for you, it’s fine to say so, but always offer alternative suggestions so the other mom sees you’re committed to forming a friendship. When you do meet up, never overstay your welcome. A good playdate should not last more than two hours, especially in the beginning, as it’s the right amount of time to minimize meltdowns.
Utilize Naptime as a Playdate
You don’t always have to wash the bottles or clean up your place while your kids are sleeping. Instead, put them in a stroller for a walk with your new friend, grab a coffee together, or meet at a park bench. There’s nothing wrong with meeting another mom for a quieter, follow-up playdate while your kids snooze. You can really focus on one another and determine if there is a true connection. Whatever the situation may be, a naptime “playdate” gives moms a chance to relax without feeling like their attention is occupied elsewhere or feeling like they’re neglecting the kids.